Are My Thoughts Lying to Me?
Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “I’m just not good enough,” or “People always leave me,” or “Why bother? Nothing ever changes”?
These kinds of thoughts can feel automatic, like background noise you’ve just learned to live with. But what if those thoughts aren't facts? What if they’re old mental habits that are quietly sabotaging your growth?
This is where Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can be a game changer.
Over time, we all develop mental shortcuts, called “schemas” or “core beliefs”- based on our early experiences. If you grew up in a critical environment, you may have internalized a belief that you’re never doing enough. If you’ve been through loss or trauma, you might have built-in assumptions about rejection or failure.
These beliefs form the lens through which we see the world. Even if the circumstances around us change, we often still default to those outdated patterns. That voice in your head telling you you’re not lovable? It might just be echoing the past, not reflecting your present.
CBT is grounded in the idea that our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors are all connected. When our thoughts are distorted, our feelings and actions follow.
Here are a few common “thinking traps” CBT helps identify and challenge:
All-or-nothing thinking: “If I’m not perfect, I’ve failed.”
Overgeneralization: “This always happens to me.”
Mind reading: “They didn’t text back—they must be mad at me.”
Catastrophizing: “If I mess this up, everything will fall apart.”
The goal isn’t to become relentlessly positive or to “think happy thoughts.” It’s to develop more balanced, realistic thinking- thoughts that actually fit the moment you’re in, not the one you were stuck in years ago.
It’s one thing to know your thinking is off—it’s another to untangle it. When you've been stuck in the same mental loops for years, it’s hard to tell what’s true and what’s just a well-worn pattern.
That’s where therapy can help.
A skilled therapist doesn’t just hand you tools; they walk alongside you while you learn to use them. They help you slow down your thought process, spot the distortions, and build new, healthier beliefs about yourself and the world around you.
And most importantly, therapy offers something your old thought patterns never will: a safe space where change isn’t just possible, it’s supported.
Therapy isn't just for when everything is falling apart. In fact, it can be most powerful when used as a proactive step- before the burnout, before the breakdown.
If you’ve noticed the same negative thoughts circling your mind, if you feel like you’re on autopilot with emotions you don’t fully understand, or if you’re simply tired of repeating old patterns, therapy might be the place to begin again.
Blog by: Anna Mills, LMSW
Supervised by: Haleigh Culverhouse, LCSW-S
